Category: Raising Children

WHAT DOES A PSYCHIATRIST SAY TO PENN STATE PLACE KICKER SAM FICKEN, WHO MISSED 4 FIELD GOALS? by Art Smukler, author & psychiatrist

by artsmuklermd, posted in Childhood Trauma, Penn State, Psychiatry, Raising Children, Self Examination, World events, a psychological view

Sam Ficken missed 4 field goal attempts and had an extra-point kick blocked in Penn State’s game against Virginia. What would I say to this young  freshman?

There’s another game next week! Really, Sam, it’s just a game. Think of all the energy and power we gave Joe Paterno, and where did that lead? This is an opportunity to show that this isn’t what you are all about.

Because others twist and attribute what we do or don’t do to suit their own needs, doesn’t mean we have to buy into it. I know it would have been easier and certainly more fun to be the hero. Well, you weren’t, but how many kids get a chance to play for a Big Ten team as a freshman? Not many!

Just getting out there, in front of thousands of screaming fans, even though you were frozen inside, was terrific. I hope Coach O’Brien gives you another chance. No-matter what happens, have courage and do your best. That’s how you’ll honor yourself. As we have learned, just winning football games is not what it’s all about. It’s about how we handle winning and losing and how we behave as human beings who care about other human beings that really counts.

Sam, don’t ever give up! And that goes for all of us…

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WHY IS BEATING YOUR BROTHER SO MUCH FUN? by Art Smukler, author & psychiatrist

by artsmuklermd, posted in Childhood Trauma, Psychiatry, Raising Children, Self Examination

“There’s enough love for both of you, Tommy,” mommy said, sometime around the time you already knew how to walk, run, talk, and understand that TV was really cool.

“Yeah, right,” Tommy thought, staring down at Larry, his 5-day-old brother, who everyone was cooing over.

“Larry loves you,” mommy said.

Tommy looks again at Larry, sleeping quietly in his crib, with slobber dripping out the side of his mouth, and instinctively knows the real truth. Love, shmub, life will never be the same again…

Years pass, and magically no one gets killed or maimed, and the 2 guys actually grow up loving each other. BUT, when it’s time for sports or ONLINE SCRABBLE, it’s a fight to the death.

In a normal game, a move might take a minute. In a brother against brother game, it might take 24 hours — at least. No surprise. The loser, like The Road Runner Rabbit, is fighting for his very existence. But, luckily, after one of the brothers is destroyed, he miraculously is reborn.

No one can ever replace your brother. After all, he’s the only one who ever truly understood what it was like growing up in your home and who your parents really were. Only you have the right to destroy your brother, knowing you’d never really hurt him and he’d never really hurt you, EXCEPT ON GAME DAY.

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