Tag: Skin Dance

BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDERS — AN APOLOGY, by Art Smukler, author & psychiatrist

by artsmuklermd, posted in Psychiatry, Self Examination

My last post on Borderline Personality Disorders provoked a great number of both positive and negative responses. I chose to not publish the negative responses for a number of reasons. One reason was that many of them were downright abusive, filled with devaluing comments and name calling. The other, and probably the most potent reason, is that some of the comments were embarrassingly true. I not only write my blog to inform, to help, and because I love writing, but to also publicize my novels. In writing about Borderline Personality Disorders I got a little carried away and become overly dramatic and one-sided.

The main reason most of the negative comments were filled with such anger was because the authors of the comments felt that I was stigmatizing their condition and unrealistically simplifying it.

I in fact did characterize BPD as an all or nothing disorder, a black or white way of looking at the world. It IS that way, but what I failed to stress is that a person suffering from this concrete approach to life can change. With therapy or self-examination or productive life experiences, they can learn to see the shades of gray in the human condition. They can better understand another person’s point of view, take responsibility for their part in the problem, and be a force that can resolve the problem.

Most of the negative comments I received were from people who had obviously gained the ability to see life in a more three-dimensional manner. My two-dimensional descriptions would understandably be anger provoking.

I wish to thank all the commenters who expressed their feelings in a way that was helpful and caused me to rethink my approach. Best Wishes.

Art Smukler MD is the author of Skin Dance, a mystery, Chasing Backwards, a psychological murder mystery, The Man with a Microphone in his Ear, and the blog, Inside the Mind of a Psychiatrist

THE MIND AS AN INSTRUMENT, by Art Smukler, author & psychiatrist

by artsmuklermd, posted in Psychiatry, Self Examination, Writing

The mind can be played with the subtly and grace of a Stradivarius violin or as bullishly and aggressively as a bass drum.

Listening to the voices from our unconscious is not an easy task. It means taking time to evaluate rather than just react. Listening and letting feelings percolate is what good therapists do, and it’s exactly what you can do for yourself. Then, when you know what you feel, and maybe even where the feeling originates, you can choose to take action or not to take action.

But sometimes, even a psychiatrist has no clue where certain feelings are coming from. In Skin Dance, a mystery, Dr. Jake Robb is miserable after Jennifer, his wife, leaves. His brother Ken tries to help.

“Jake, I know you’re the shrink and I’m the attorney, but you have to admit that what’s really bothering you isn’t that crazy patient you were telling me about, but Jennifer. Hiding out isn’t going to bring her back. If you were treating yourself, you’d never advocate a treatment of social withdrawal and overdosing on carbs.”

Sighing, Jake felt himself sinking lower and lower into a puddle of depression. Mose Allison’s melancholy voice coming from the stereo wasn’t helping the situation.

“Listen Bro. We’re going out tonight. I’m not taking no for an answer.” Ken’s tone was insistent, undercurrents of worry lacing his words, like scotch through soda. “You won’t believe where we’re going…”

So Jake, like most of us, wasn’t clear on why he was feeling so down. He’d have to work hard to figure out the source of his depression. In Jake’s case, his life would depend on it. For us, our happiness and piece of mind may not be a life or death situation, but it will be an essential component to having a satisfying life.

So how do you do it?

Write down your dreams, fantasies, feelings, and the way you’re behaving in stressful situations. Then try to connect the patterns. Are the patterns a repetition from the past? Are you displacing feelings from your childhood and aiming them at a spouse or friend or child? It’s certainly not easy to discover what’s hidden in the unconscious, and a therapist might be necessary, but I assure you, learning to play a Stradivarius is a much better choice than battering your way through life. Except maybe if the bad guys are closing in…

Art Smukler MD is the author of Skin Dance, a mystery, Chasing Backwards, a psychological murder mystery, The Man with a Microphone in his Ear, and…drum roll… The popular blog, Inside the Mind of a Psychiatrist.